Moving Forward While Looking Back

In high school, I couldn’t wait to take "Behind the Wheel." Driving meant freedom. Independence. No more waiting around for rides or being chauffeured by my parents. I couldn’t wait to get behind the wheel and just go.

But like most things in life, it wasn’t all smooth roads.

I’ll never forget one lesson: my instructor asked me to reverse and weave through a set of cones—while going over speed bumps. I remember thinking, When would this ever be useful in real life?
Still, I did it. Partly because I had to, but also because I imagined the day I’d be in a similar situation and could flex on someone by saying, “Don’t worry, I got this.”

Welp, that day never came.

Recently, stuck in traffic, I caught myself constantly checking the rearview mirror, watching to see how many cars made it through each light. Then I almost rear-ended someone.

And it hit me: I was so focused on what was behind me, I nearly wrecked what was right in front of me.

That moment became a metaphor for how we often live our lives, constantly glancing backward, analyzing past decisions, replaying regrets, wondering what if. We let our history become the lens we use to judge our present.

It’s like trying to drive through life in reverse—navigating cones (challenges), bouncing over speed bumps (setbacks), all while staring in the rearview mirror.

This brings on feelings of being stuck and lost.

You can’t reach your next destination if you’re obsessing over what’s behind you.

Yes, your past holds pain, mistakes, even moments you wish you could erase. But it also holds proof that you’re resilient. Creative. Strong. That you’ve already made it through things you once thought would break you.

Still, we get stuck. We wear shame and fear like armor, believing they’ll protect us from ever messing up again. But fear-based decisions don’t move us forward. They keep us navigating in reverse.

What you're missing is: you are not that person anymore.

The version of you who made those decisions? They didn’t have the insight, healing, or experience you have now. You’ve grown. You’ve adapted. You’ve learned.

Everything you’ve gone through is proof you can do hard things—even on bumpy roads with unclear signs.

So maybe it’s time to stop driving backwards through life.

You don’t need to keep rehearsing the past to avoid pain.

The real flex?
Trusting yourself enough to move forward with clarity, courage, and confidence.

Because freedom doesn’t live in the rearview mirror.

Freedom lives in believing in who you are now—and where you’re headed next.