“Every sunset is an opportunity to reset.” —Richie Norton
A year ago, I was going through several life changes: I moved twice in one year, changed jobs twice, and a close friendship became strained. I felt like my life was spiraling away from me. Each decision came with its own set of challenges. I felt defeated and tired.
I shared with someone my intention to hit a hard reset, and they looked at me with only confusion. “You are just going to hit a hard reset and move on?” Yep! You aren’t going to agonize over your decision?” I clutched at the pearls I wasn't wearing, and it was my turn to be confused. Agonize? No, I am giving myself grace.
Life is about living and taking chances. I made decisions based on the information I had at the time. If I obtain more information, I make adjustments. That’s life. Why would I agonize? She went on to say that if we don’t penalize ourselves for poor decisions we'll end up repeating the same mistakes.
Punishing ourselves for making a decision seems harsh to me. Where is the self-compassion? What would you say to someone else in a similar situation? Would you bash, shame, and degrade them? I seriously doubt it. What do you believe is the appropriate punishment for losing your footing? We humans tend to be kinder and gentler towards others than ourselves. We have to remember that we are doing our best just like others are.
When I was experiencing some turmoil in my life, instead of focusing on what I lost (a friend, money, and time), I choose to focus on how I persevered. How I stood by my decisions, even if they were less popular. I trusted in my gut and in the research I conducted.
I have learned the hard lesson that life requires me to be flexible in thought. I can’t be so focused when something isn't working and my ego is bruised that I refuse to make the necessary adjustments. At some point, a reset is needed.
Although my hard reset occurred right around the New Year, it was important for me not to tie them together. Instead of choosing January 1st, I chose January 3rd, a random Friday. A not so perfect day.
I like to use New Year's to set my intentions for the year. The problem I have with New Year’s resolutions is that they tend to fade away by late February. Resets can occur at any time. It doesn’t have to be a Monday, beginning of the month, beginning of a quarter, or New Year. You can initiate a reset the moment you realize a behavior, mindset, or any situation no longer suits you.
Be kind to yourself and stay well.